top of page

Enjoy Yourself (It’s Later Than You Think)*

Writer's picture: St Helens Walking Football St Helens Walking Football

Patience, they say, is a virtue “The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy Wise words certainly, but one is left to wonder if it was ever meant to apply to the wonderful world of Walking Football?

SHWFC members in the tender years of their Walking Football careers might understandably have been unforgiving to be left outside the hallowed turf (AstroTurf that is) of the PSD Stadium some thirty minutes after scheduled kick off time

Word eventually came back that someone had forgotten to come to open up So patience was stretched possibly to a greater degree than Tom Parr’s hamstrings before we finally gained access

A tricky start to the week’s sessions but we endured


Under the new ultra efficient system of preparation Football Manager Andy Man Houghton announced the team line ups in advance With the delay now reaching a whole new level of tardiness our usual team photographic procedure was abandoned so that play could commence before the remaining daylight elapsed


Thirty Eight members or 6 teams, with a 7-a-side game plus 2 games of 6-a-side, were hastily kicked in to action Referees for the session were usual suspects Jeff Betty and Eamon O’Hooligan plus Alan ‘Aldo’ Aldridge

Aldo fared well thanks to some previous experience and the high level of sportsmanship and bonhomie of all players in the seven a side contest


Those playing were;


Black - Citeh Geoff, Lord Rainford, El Presidente, Margaret, Steve Jones, Barry Wizz and Glen


Pink - Sheila, PaulF, Chris K, Les H, Enoch, Chopper and Donal


Black with a very solid and seasoned defensive trio (Citeh Geoff, Lord Rainford and El Presidente) were rarely under pressure The real contest was focused in the midfield areas where Chris K, Enoch and Donal went toe to toe with Glen, Barry and Steve Jones There wasn’t much to chose with both teams playing well and passing and pressing to gain the upper hand In the end the game was decided by a fine goal by Margaret plus a sharp goal from Barry for Black Chris K scored a fine goal from deep in reply Black’s game management and experience kept their opponents limited to shots from distance Even the untimely but necessary step to withdraw El Presidente to a prolonged spell as keeper was no problem Black winning 2-1 but rather more comfortably than the score might suggest


Yellow played their first game against Purple with Eamon guiding his charges to a fine six goal thriller


The sides were;

Yellow - Amazon, Kirsty, Simon, Gaz, Snakehips and Les Meldrew


Purple - McSpeed, Robin, Mark NR, Phil the Cat, Tony W, Cockney Rebel and Grazer (1st game)


The game pulsed from end to end but Yellow edged the scoring Amazon Prime with a brace, Simon (a rare Monday outing) and Tony (but which one?)with a goal each McSpeed and the other Tony (no me either) replying for Purple 4-2 the final score

In the other opening encounter Orange pipped Sky by two goals from Thatto Dave and Joe the Ghost sealing a win Sky unable to find a reply to pressure Orange


Orange - Thatto Dave, Phil the Moss, Haggis, Joe the Ghost, Harry the Hatchet and Wickie Grazer joined the Pips after Harry was blunted in the first game


Sky - Willo, Eileen, Charlie, Lefty Bridge, Andy Man and Mika


In the second series of games Orange were peeled apart by Yellow Les, Kirsty and Simon all hitting the target Grazer made some decent saves but could do little to prevent the Yellow tide One save resulted in a dislocated finger with a possible fracture declared later in the day

Purple eclipsed the Sky with McSpeed claiming a brace and AN Other Tony also on target Lefty Bridge hit the Sky consolation


The indecent haste to start play after the unfortunate earlier no-show delay meant that no photographs were provided to assist Blog accuracy This calamitous circumstance should not affect the literary veracity however, as most weeks the Blog bares only a passing resemblance to the true story of the session


The tardiness of members to the sumptuous surroundings of the Slipper Salon meant that the St Helens Young Mothers Formation Pram team had grabbed our usual seating SHWFC members who could still put in an appearance (some had to dash off for bedtime) were relegated to the adjoining Committee Room (or Dining Room as it is sometimes referred to)

No cake was evident perhaps it had not survived the anxious waiting period Who knows?


Wednesday was a more routine gathering despite the European distraction once again claiming the attentions of so many For those who did elect to play, some fine action was their reward

The Innards diminished to a four a side spectacle once again employing the Bins to act as permanent keepers at each end of the pitch


Jeff Betty trained his eye on the action (or in the case of the Bins inaction) The two teams were as follows;


Red - Peter T, Citeh Geoff, Eamon and Deggs plus D Bin


Neon - Grav, Joe the Ghost, Lord Rainford and Triallist plus AN Other Bin

Joe opened the scoring cashing in after Red had wasted several chances Grav doubled the lead set-up by Lord Rainford 2-0 Neon coasting Lord Rainford was (harshly?) judged to have wandered into his area Eamon tucked away the resulting penalty Did he send the Bin the wrong way? Soon after Eamon demonstrated a cool head to level the game 2-2 Deggs took a chance at last to fire Red 3-2 ahead Grav levelled again for 3-3 Deggs and Citeh Geoff went top bins for Red to go 5-3 up Grav hot back for 5-4

Deggs Cooley slotted a penalty Red 6-4 ahead, Grav wasted a chance from the penalty spot before Deggs piled on the agony 7-4 Grav hit back for 7-5

In a bizarre moment Deggs deflected a fierce shot by Peter T to claim another Red goal 8-5 Joe ghosted a reply before Triallist wrapped up the scoring 9-7 (though I can only find eight goals) for Red

No matter Red was triumphant No Bins were damaged during the session Way too many wasted shots and wayward defenders invading their own penalty areas Great fun too


There was an equally engaging game outside played in perfect conditions Both teams playing some wonderful stuff

The teams were;

White - Jason, Deano, Haggis, Neil Stretch and Cockney Rebel


Blue - Mark Dav, Andy Man, Eileen, Little John and Chris 4G

El Presidente enjoyed an incident free evening, combining his refereeing duties with a good ball boy work out retrieving wayward shots

Deano struck early for the White to get the scoring underway Chris 4G missed a decent chance at the other end unable to apply a finish when a cool head was required Blue mounted a prolonged period of pressure with a series of corners to test Neil in the White goal Mark Dav finished a great move for Blue with a great turn and finish 1-1 Haggis latched on to defence splitting pass from Mr Rebel to fire White 2-1 ahead White extended the lead with Jason squeezing home from close in 3-1 White taking their chances the only real difference at this point Chris 4G pounced after a keeper parry to make it 3-2 White holding the lead but Blue pushing for parity thanks to some great one touch passing

Andy Man found the net for 3-3 after a marvellous piece of teamwork Chris 4G shaved the post and then hit another drive that hit the same post, two chances spurned as Blue pressed for the lead The half time interval arrived with both teams creating chances but no further goals to show

The second half was another footballing feast both sides committed to spray the ball about in search of the break through Blue seemed the likeliest to find the net with incisive passing But Jason found the net to fire White 4-3 in front slightly against the run of play Into the final 15 minutes Blue continued to create but still were wasteful Dav was off target when through on goal Close but no cigar Jason scored to punish Blue 5-3 Cockney Rebel made no mistake to make 6-3 White seemingly out of sight or could Blue find a way back?

Almost immediately Andy rammed home to make it 6-4 the Blue fight back underway After a period of sustained pressure Chris 4G found the net for 6-5 White now hanging on to their narrow advantage Blue made their pressure pay when Andy Man finished another great move to claim the equaliser


In the closing moments play was condensed with both teams acutely aware of their opponent’s fire power El Presidente had the last word when at the final whistle he led a chorus of praise for the quality of play on show

After a week of late shows the final six minutes could not produce a deciding goal Walking Football the true winner


Enjoy Yourself (It’s Later Than You Think)* - Guy Lombardo and the Canadians (Louis Prima, The Specials, Jools Holland and Prince Buster even Doris Day)





Recent Posts

See All

Comentários


  • Twitter
  • facebook
  • linkedin
  • w3c

©2019 by St Helens Walking Football Club. Proudly created with Wix.com

bottom of page