God Bless The Child*

Like a much-loved child there are some people who rarely disappoint Some players flit in and out of a game whilst others graft away quietly just getting on with it Others still are all-action good or bad but never can be over-looked or ignored Having made quite a mark in the first game tonight's hero was thrust under the spotlight and like a good jigsaw promptly went to pieces whenever this writer was watching Oh well, we'll just have to rely on the reports from his press officers that he had a blinder

On a balmy evening on the Sutton Pampas 23 souls took to the luxurient AstroTurf to warm up under the watchful eye of Gaz Clark (sometime goalkeeping coach not that anyone volunteered for that specialist role) In addition a walking wounded squad including; El Presidente (knee knack) Lord Rainford (knee kanck too) Phil the Power (chest weeze) and Tony Snakehips (hearing aid battery failure) were in attendance to act as Referee, Umpire, Stand in Keeper and Ball Boy (now that's quite a stretch - Editor)

The teams were ruthlessly selected by Gaz and Les and lined up as follows;

White - Goldie, Tom Derby, Martin Mc, Cockney Rebel, Ox and Phil (press ganged into keeping duties where his chest alment would be least at risk)

Orange - Willo, Disco Deggs, Andy Capt., Gaz, Les and debutant John Penders

Bllack - Haggis, Tom Stretch, Cithe Geoff, Bally, Dave Bates Motel and returning Darron Whalley

Lemon Neon - Chris 4G, Paul Porter, Mark NR, Jeff Betty, Colin the late and Joe the Ghost

The opening game saw Black take on Lemon (Neon Yellow) a clash that had no advers affect on the colour blind in our entourage The eraly stages were even with both sides playing neat 3 touch football Yellow took full advantage of thedefensive naivete of the Black picking off poor clearances and wayward nay suicidal passes to score through Mark Davies (No Relation) and Joe the Ghost who cheekily picked the Black pockets twice to score 3-0 and a game that started very evenly was now beyond Black They did create some late chances through Tom Stretch and Darron looked a threat but Lemon squeezed the result somewhat against the odds

On the adjacent pitch Orange crushed White 4-0 with all goals evidently scored by Taylor D However the goals cannot be independently verified so 0-0 was the more probable result

In Round 2 El Presidente was warned to monitor the Huyton Hitman goal taker supreme Needless to say Black v Orange was a eagerly anticipated match up and using their Crush Press tactic Orange held a high line against Black for long periods But rather like a jigsaw going to pieces when given a clear sight of goal Orange's main man mis-fired repeatedly Instead Black sprung the trap to take the lead with half of the game over Darron Whalley firing across the goal to find the opener Bally repeated the move but from the right flank to double the score 2-0 Black Two further goals from Darron (back after a calf imjury had curtailed his first session) took the game away from Orange

There was a much tighter game played under the gaze of Umpire Lord Rainford wi,th White shading Lemon by 3 goals to 2 Goals by the Ox, Cockney Rebel and Tom Derby sealed a narrow victory A brace from Paul Porter insufficient to claim the win

The night's alst action pitted the Citrus Derby once more with Oranges and Lemons (and no bells from anywhere south of Watford) a truly cordial affair The early action included a fine shot by new boy John Penders dealth with by Mark NR with his usal ecomy of effort There was a footrace between Disco Deggs and Joe the Ghost - Joe wonning but hawled back for a blatant piece fo running ('he must have been quick I couldn't ctach him - said the Huyton Hitman) the opening goal followed a fine 'one-two' played between Gaz and John Penders - John opening his account with the Club much to his team mates delight The game was a close encounter and Lemon held the advantage into the last 5 minutes The best chance of the night was wasted Taylor D firing wide with a clear open goal, undeterred he claimed a penalty moments later but was denied by the Ref A last effort was kept out by Chris 4G and with that Lemon held out to win 1-0 Orange had their chances but couldn't crush the Lemon resolve

Lord Rainford officiated over the last game, the night's highest scoring encuonter with Black and White sharing the spoils and 8 goals in a fine -4 draw Goals by Darron 3 and a corker from Harry (curving left foot effort into the far corner) were cancelled out by 2 goals from Mike Ox plus a Cockney Rebel penalty and leveller from Martin Mc

4-4 a goal fest much enjoyed by M'Lord and all on-lookers

'A great night's effort all rewarded in that last game' Phil the Power Middleton

Onwards and upwards my braves

God Bless The Child* - Billie Holiday 1942 release on Okeh Records (also a great cover by Blood, Sweat and Tears 1969)